Continue reading “Double-Adoptee Indeterminacy”
Quantum indeterminacy—the fundamental condition of existence, supported by all empirical evidence, in which an isolated quantum system, such as a free electron, does not possess fixed properties until observed in experiments designed to measure those properties. That is, a particle does not have a specific mass, or position, or velocity, or spin, until those properties are measured. Indeed, in a strict sense the particle does not exist until observed.—Joint Quantum Institute
“Leave the past in ashes.”
What I really want to tell you is—I feel an ache in my heart that gives me no rest. Meet me here.Continue reading “Ash Wednesday”
Originally published at AnneHeffron.com. I wrote this piece one year ago, my first go at writing about my life as a double-adoptee, and it remains a favorite. Enjoy!
I was relinquished and placed for adoption when I was nine years old. My adopters’ names were listed as my parents on my birth certificate, they gave me a new name, and no one I previously knew as family could legally have contact with me. I was received by my adopters as if I were a blank slate, with no history of my own.
But that’s not where this story begins. Let me try again.Continue reading “Love and Loss and Love Again”
Are You Proud of Me?
Am I everything you hoped I would be?Continue reading “Dear Adoption, Are You Proud of Me?”
The lie of adoption as I’ve lived it—that I can be compelled to call strangers mother and father and family, strangers who can dispose of me, “rehome” me when I cease to please them or serve their needs; that I exist as part of other people’s stories while robbed of a story and agency of my own—grips my heart, presses upon my chest like a fist. I struggle to breathe against its weight. I feel helpless, frozen, as the lie chokes the light from my body, severing my life into unrelated fragments.Continue reading “Birthright”